My mother is not a traveler.  Unlike her son and his family who are perfectly happy to wander around the globe for the rest of their lives, my Mom carries an intense disdain for all things travel related.  She can't stand cars and planes, she hates packing, she is not big on experiencing new cultures.  My mom sees a bridge and goes straight to her happy place.  The thought of a chile pepper makes her sweat. Adventure is just not on her agenda.

Despite knowing this, I continue to try and persuade her that travel is an enlightening gift that would change her world if she would just give it a chance.  In return my Mother just gives me those ARE YOU NUTS glances and goes about her everyday business. Now, I know I should just give up and accept that travel is not for everyone.  But I am stubborn.  The world is a big place.  And it is surely big enough to accommodate my Mother on some adventurous, foreign journey.

So Mom, since it's your special day I decided to take you on a little Mother's Day tour of the world to show you it's not all as crazy as you think.   My hope is that maybe, just maybe, we can find some place new and exotic where we can all celebrate Mother's Day together next year.

Fingers Crossed and A Very Happy Mother's Day.

MEXICO

Didn't you go to Mexico on your honeymoon Mom?

Why not go back?

I know I'm nuts, especially after flashing up a picture of these lovely Chapulines we would have to dine on.  The thought of my Mom eating grasshoppers in a 100 degree desert is priceless to me and at the same time torturous for my mother.  Amazing how a mental image can invoke two totally different responses.

Obviously, I am not serious about Mexico Mom,  I just wanted to get some of the real winners off the list early.   But just so you know, on Mother's Day in Mexico kids wake their moms up with a little song and dance.  That's sweet right?  And then they serve her fried grasshoppers in bed. My kind of Mother's Day, but clearly not yours.  Ok, moving on.

INDIA

How about India?  It doesn't even look hot in this picture.  And camels - they're not so bad.  I think you could do it.  I also heard they have a 10 day celebration for Mother's Day in October, one of your favorite months.  10 days of celebrating mom sounds pretty sweet!

But of course we must consider all the foreign smells, spices, dirt and crowds.

And bathing in the Ganges?

Not gonna happen.

Personally I think India could be magical, but Mom down by the riverside is not going to happen in this lifetime.  Next!

ETHIOPIA

Mom, I know you wouldn't even get out of bed if I told you we were going to Ethiopia.  Sun, desert, animals - not your thing.  As well, it is tradition on Mother's Day for the moms in Ethiopia to spread butter all over their faces while the men play traditional music.  Can you imagine?  Dad singing and you spreading butter all over your face.  There's a home video I wish I had to put on You Tube.

I am sure the people of Ethiopia find our customs to be just as strange, that's what makes the world so great.  I can't wait to visit Ethiopia some day, but I know you're going to have to pass on this one Mom.

SERBIA

Ok Mom, you're going to love Serbia. Doesn't it look beautiful? And get this, they have best Mother's Day tradition ever!

It all starts in December on Children's day when the mother gets to tie up the children until they promise to behave.

Now I have got your attention!  Can you believe that?

I know deep down you have wanted to do this a few times and still refrained. And that is a good thing.

I remember us kids wanted to put you on lockdown as well sometimes. And guess what, in Serbia they do. The kids actually get to have their revenge by tying mom to the bed until she gives them candy and presents.  You can't make this stuff up. Can you imagine what the neighbors would have said?

I think Serbian Mother's Day traditions are best celebrated in Serbia. Of course, we will have to take Heidi there for a Mother's Day and let the kids have fun with this one, but for you Mom, I understand if you want to pass.

ARGENTINA

Think Europe meets Texas Mom.  Then again, don't think that.

Try thinking about this instead.  They have a tradition on Mother's Day where they hide the grandmother outside while the kids read poetry to the parents. The grandmother isn't allowed back in until the reading is over.  Can you see Grandma standing outside in the streets of Buenos Aires? Priceless.  Then again, you're a grandmother now too so that really doesn't work either. Damn! I thought we had a winner.

Argentina is reasonably priced and I am sure they have good shopping.  Plus they love a good steak and so do you!  But that idea of hanging outside and trying to speak Spanish.  I'm not seeing it.

SWEDEN

Hey Mom, this looks cute. And guess what?  It's cold for most of the year! And oh, on Mother’s Day in Sweden they have a big charity drive. The Red Cross sells small plastic flowers leading up to the holiday, and all the proceeds raised go to families in need.  I like it, I know you do too.  Could we have a winner?  Sweden?  We could go shopping in Stockholm and stop in for a bite of some local pickled herring.

What's that?

Oh yeah, right.  No fish.

But they have Swedish meatballs like at Ikea?

Not happening?  Ok, just one more place I know that might work.

.

As they say, if it ain't broke . . .

Maybe the world is a little crazy.  Great, beautiful and worth exploring, but crazy nonetheless.

We will stick to home Mom, good old NYC.  Lasagna, Air Conditioning and all the other comforts of home.  We can always flick on the Travel Channel.

Happy Mother's Day.  We love you and thanks!

The Great Family Escape is on Facebook and Twitter.  We would love for you to follow along.

Special thanks to The Holiday Spot for providing all the Mother's day info for this post.

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